Sunday, April 22, 2012

A snake, and a broken nose…

One of my favorite phrases is, “You can’t make this stuff up!”  And we’ve used that phrase a lot in our house when everything falls apart at the same time as it so often does!
My husband met me at Little Miss’ school this week so we could attend an art show open house.  Right before I pulled in my tire pressure light went on—and I didn’t think much of it.  But by the time I got out of the car at her school—we were down to the rim, yep!!  Flat tire!  My husband changed the tire, and over an hour later we finally got back home.
As I pulled into my driveway and walked up to my keypad on my garage, what was waiting for me??  A snake—yes folks, a snake.  And not an ordinary snake, but a sweet little COPPERHEAD!!  Isn’t that a heartwarming thing to come home to??  I froze while watching Justin, oblivious to the snake, walk towards it.  I told the kids to get back in the car and waited for my husband to pull in, who was coming right behind me.  He went up to it to take a closer look (note to readers: don’t actually approach the snake unless you have a good weapon in hand…) and it slithered away under my front bushes!!  Gross.  And after 30 minutes of looking for it, now with the shovel as a weapon in hand (we’re quick learners!), we couldn’t find that thing anywhere.  Little Miss says, “I hope it didn't find a crack in our house to slide into.”  Um, I am at the high end of hysteria at this point.
I wouldn’t let my husband go inside, and kept telling him we should dig up the flower bed completely and rid ourselves of this demon snake—but alas, my rational husband won this debate and went out and bought some “snake-be-gone” product and came home and spread it along the perimeter of the house.
I COULD NOT go to sleep that night thinking about that gross little snake getting the best of us and slithering away into the abyss of my flower beds!!  I would be lying if I said I didn’t sleep with the light on that night.
But it just reminded me of a great story of one of those series of unfortunate events of when my husband broke my nose last year—and as odd as it sounds, it was because of a snake!!
Last year we had a rash of illness that had hit everyone but me, all within two weeks time frame.  My husband had been so sick, that they had to put him on a steroid so he could clear up his lungs.  The kids were all pitifully sick, and I was 9 weeks pregnant and trying to avoid all the sickness from everyone else.  I was feeling so exhausted one night, and had just learned that Little Miss had strep throat.  I look at my husband before I fell asleep and said, “We’re going to make it through, right??  Everyone will be on antibiotics now, and it’s going to get better now, right?”  He reassured me it would, just like he always does and I fell asleep.
I woke up at 2:30am to what felt like a 2 x 4 hitting me in the face.  I am not over dramatizing this one.  I screamed out and as I did, I heard my husband say, “Oh no, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”  I originally thought Justin had jumped in our bed and kicked me or something, but when the husband started apologizing, I though, “What in the world just happened.”  I was grabbing my face and bawling and then I felt all the blood running down my face and screamed for my husband to get me an ice pack and towel.”  I bawled for about an hour, and I can’t tell you how bad it hurt—and again, I was pregnant and limited on any kind of good pain relief. 
As I’m sobbing on the edge of the bed, my husband keeps saying how sorry he is and that he was having a bad dream.  I knew that was the case—but didn’t care at the moment!!  Then he says, “I think it’s the steroids I’m taking, I’ve had these crazy dreams the last few nights.”  Steroids?  You mean the punch to my face was a steroid-packed-punch??  Not making the situation better…
He kept begging me to let him tell me what the dream was about.  And I kept telling him I didn’t care what it was about because he broke my nose!!  It was awful.  He felt so bad he said he was going to sleep on the floor so he wouldn’t hit me again.  And as I tried to fall asleep an hour later, sitting up with ice packed on my face, I hear my husband’s plea from the darkness, “Can I please tell you about the dream?”  I finally give in, and he tells me he was hiking in the mountains with Justin, and that a giant snake came out of nowhere to get Justin.  He said he looked around in his dream and found a giant rock and knew he had to hit that snake as hard as he could on its head to kill it…
I had at that point stopped crying, but when he explained what he was dreaming about, I knew he really had hit me that hard and my nose was probably broken.  I asked him through my tears, “Why would telling me you were protecting Justin make me feel better??  It just makes me realize how hard you were swinging for me!”  Poor guy, he felt sooooo bad…
Went to the doctor the next day and they couldn’t do surgery because I was pregnant, and I did recover from the blow to my face quite well—and will someday get my slanty nose fixed…but who had time for that with all the fun things I could be making!!
Here’s a pic of me and my husband a couple days after he broke my nose and we were joking about how I needed to get him back…with the sock monkey mittens!!
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But seriously, it’s all good and makes for some great story telling and laughs now…I love this guy…
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See, it’s like I said,”You really can’t make this stuff up!!”
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19 comments:

  1. I'm stopping in from the blog hop. I'm following. I host a weekly link party on Wednesdays and I'd love for you to link up your latest posts. You can find me at www.thenymelrosefamily.blogspot.com.

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    1. Thanks Jenny, so glad you stopped by!

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  2. My goodness EEK EEK EEK! What a way to wake up! Haha! I am your newest follower. I have a feeling I am going to love your blog!!! Happy to meet you friend!

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  3. OH MY GOODNESS, that story is a hoot! I can't even imagine the Dr.'s expression on his face when you said, "Um, my husband accidentally broke my nose." Lol So glad you healed ok. One time I woke up to my husband kicking me as hard as could over and over, but thankfully I woke him up before he could do any serious harm.

    Thanks for stopping by and linking up to the Mingle Blog Hop and for following my blog. I am following you back. :)

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    1. Yeah, luckily the doctor knew me and my husband well enough he just winced and said he was sorry---before he started cracking up! Thanks for stopping by!

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  4. The EXACT same thing happened to me last week. It was inside of our screened in front porch right in front of the door. I was home alone and leaped over it into my house. My fiance came home and couldn't find it so I'm paranoid everytime I leave the house. I scream and run like a crazy woman haha I almost feel like we live in the same place. You said your town got a cheddars and we both have snakes in front of house haha I'm excited to read along, I'm your newest follower :)

    Josie
    www.letterstosoph.com

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    1. That is crazy!! We live a few hours south of you, the snakes must be plotting against us!!

      So glad you could stop by!

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  5. I've seen your quilt in a couple different sites and simply adore it. I found you via the live.laugh.rowe blog hop party. Looking forward to getting to know you.

    - Eva - @ http://theevasofbellabini.blogspot.com/

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  6. Oh my heck!! That is crazy!

    Thanks so much for linking up to the Sunday Blog Hop. I am of course following you.

    Danielle @ Blissful and Domestic
    www.blissfulanddomestic.com

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  7. I am a relatively new follower and I love your blog! That story is hilarious (now that you've recovered of course!) I had a similar experience where my husband was dreaming one night but instead of punching me in the face he SPIT in my face! I was livid of course then, but now we can both laugh about it! :o)

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    1. Yeah, it's ALL funny now, but so alarming in the moment--wow, spitting?? Good thing we both have a sense of humor!

      Shannon

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  8. Everything does happen at once...and truth is stranger than fiction! I'm enjoying your blog, Shannon! Thanks for visiting me today!

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  9. Holy moly! I had something similar happen to me where my husband was sleeping {dreaming} and I got slapped by a forearm to the face. Nothing like a 2 x 4 though! My goodness, being pregnant had to make it that much worse! Thankfully your doctor knows you all well enough he didn't think it was more than just a crazy accident!

    I'm your newest follower!

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    1. Thanks Melissa for stopping by, I'm excited to follow your blog too!

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  10. I'm a pretty new follower & really enjoy your blog! I thought my husband was bad. But wow, this blows his stuff out of the water.

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Thanks for sharing your comments, I love hearing from you and I love new followers!